Animation by Plague of Gripes

Reptite hostilities were never about racial supremacy. In fact, most of the reason why they had been at war with humans for so long is because human leaders were always supermodels in tiny fur bikinis, which had a habit of falling off in the middle of a fight. Or meals. Or just standing around. If the girls chose to wear them at all. In comparison, Reptite women are little more than watery bags made of scales with a crap covered cloaca for a fun hole. The Reptite leader, Azala, herself admits, “I wouldn’t fuck myself with a stolen dick. Lizard Jesus, what I wouldn’t give for a mammary or two. Did you know human girls have two holes? Three if you’re adventurous. Listen, it’s us or them. If I have to look at their bangin’ ass bodies one more day I’m going to blow my walnut sized brain out.”